Why did the man cross the road? He was hungry and homeless, and in search of chicken.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the city on the other side. He hoped he could find work in one of the city's cheap factories. He needed money for his family: he could not bear to see them slowly starve for any longer. If he could get a lowly-paid job he may be able to just sustain them. But he knew it could not last for long. He would probably die on the streets or in the slums, cold, lonely and starving. But it was a risk worth taking - he could not see his own family waste slowly away like so many of his friends had.

Why was Frankenstein green? Because he painted himself green. Frankenstein is the scientist, not the monster.

Your mama so stupid, she put 2 quarters in her ears and said she was istening to Fiftycent

my names jim haha

How did the mecanic die? He drowned

When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

A kid is riding down the street when his chain pops off his bicycle. The kid yells "God damn!" as he begins to fix it. A priest walking nearby overhears the boy taking god's name in vein and says "Don't say 'God damn' say 'God help us'". The kid says, "I am an atheist, get away from me".

Q. A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car. Who's driving? A. The police officer

An Amish walks into Best Buy

One kid clicks his pen. The kid sitting next to home clicks his pen. They next 3 kids click their pens. The teacher walks by and says "monkey see monkey do." And the kid that first clicked his pen responded and says "monkey pees all over you."

a duck walks in to a Chinese restaurant and they cut his head off

Whats green and tasty? Snot

What's green and goes "Kablowie!"? Probably nothing.

Three men of varying ethnic backgrounds jump off a building and yell different things as they fall to their death. They were all very good friends and neglected to have had a trip sitter watch them take hallucinogenics. The group of school children below the building are traumatized for a good portion of their lives.

Q: What did the Asian say to the Jew? A: Nothing. They were both anti-social and preferred to stray from face-to-face conversations.

Women's rights.

Whats 10+10? A mathematical equation.

A jew, a catholic, and a muslim walk into a bar. Within minutes, they begin to argue about religion. After a few hours of intense debate, all three left dissatisfied and upset.

What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? An Irish wedding is the celabration of two people joining in matrimony, and an Irish funeral is a somber rememberence of a deceased person.

how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

What do you get when you mix life and cyanide? Death.

What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? Most people are ignorant of the global sex slave trafficking industry and apathetic about global hunger.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...