One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose fell on your head." ..."MMMBBWWAAAAAGGGHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Two ducks are in a pond. The one duck asks, "Can you pass the soap?" The other duck says, "What do I look like, a typewriter?"

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There is an Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman and they are climbing up a mountain, when they reach the top and decide to climb down again.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out that your mother just got raped by ten black men and then coming home to her dead body and getting raped by the same men who raped your mom.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cannibal. Cannibal wh... As the man opened the door, he was eaten. And they lived happily ever after. The end.

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What did the Hindenburg say? -nothing it just blew up

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how do you drown a blonde? chain her to a cinder block and throw her off a bridge.

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What do you get with two banana peels? Compost.

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Why do Jews have big noses? Because it is genetic.

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what was the funniest part of the titanic sinking? nothing, many innocent people were killed and left their family devastated.

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Five guys one rape.

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the awkward when you said "moment" in your head

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Life is like a box of chocolates, It doesn't last too long for fat people.

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Why did the blond jump off the cliff? She was paragliding for her 20th birthday.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a pedophile.

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Why did the white man win the race Because there were no black people attending

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a black guy with rights in 1924

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Why was the boy sad? Because his dog was brutally murdered and the man responsible painted his bedroom walls in the dogs blood.

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Q: How many vaginas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Just one.

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What do Ethiopians do at night? Sleep

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? He was buried under 6ft of solid earth.

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What's the difference between a Satyr play and a Sedar meal? One is full of horned goat-men, the other is a feast that marks the beginning of Passover.

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shabalabadingdong JLR

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Why can black people jump shoot and steal? Because society’s stereotypes have influenced people in thinking that African Americans can jump really high, shoot a basketball well and commit theft.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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