What did the little boy with diabetes get for Christmas? A shot of insulin; just like every other day.

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What's the difference between you and a bucket of shit? The bucket and the shit. You're a human being.

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Do they have a fourth of July in England? Yes, but it is just a sad reminder to them that all the cool people left for America.

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Why did the black man bleed to death? He was stabbed, but he bled to death because his doctor had just prescribed him some blood-thinners for his serious headaches.

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Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours? A: Cheese.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse replies "I'm a talking horse and that's what you ask me? On the day I just buried my only son?"

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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im passing this on from a friend: 2 blondes walk into a building, you think one woulda saw it,

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A dog walks into a bar. He's a service animal, so this is allowed.

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roses r nice violet are fine all be the 6 and you be 9

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How do you find out a chinese's name? Ask him/her

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What do you call a woman in the kitchen? Her name.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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Amazing

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why didn't bob die? because he liked his hair just the way it was.

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whats worse than a chicken crossing the road 10 dead babies in a bucket

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9!

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What do you give a homeless person? Poop in a bottle.

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar and order two beers

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What did the cat say to the hamster? Meow

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What do you call a black man that can steal, shoot, and jump? A basketball player.

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"I saw daddy with mommy last night. I think he was stealing my milk."

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An Irishman walked out of a bar

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Did you hear about that guy? He had a wonderful morning.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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