Roses are red, Violets are blue, i know where you live now I'm coming for you

Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water? A: It'll take a while for me to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick(: hahah.

Where did Sarah go during the bombing? Everywhere.

a man was beating his wife his wife asks him to stop he says no and continues beating her

Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

knock knock. who's there? interupting doctor. interupting doctor who....you have cancer.

What's worse then ten dead babies in a barrel? The one at the bottom is still alive.

Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

Why did the train stop? - It was surrounded by elephants

Q: What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A: "Get in the car."

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a tub of KFC

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him to leave.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because women have the same rights as men thanks to the 19th amendment and sexism needs to die.

A blonde was very smart, and nobody made fun of her when she sometimes made small mistakes like every other person regardless of hair color.

What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

A black guy wearing a mask runs into a store, points his gun at the cashier, steals some money and runs out. The police start an investigation the following morning

Whats blue and white and red all over? The American flag

Why did the platypus have no friends? Platipi are antisocial creatures by nature.

Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because the Nazis were on the brink of losing the war and Berlin was shortly to be captured by Soviet forces.

Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's. Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's.

A man walks into a bar, the other man ducks.

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

What was the racist kid's least favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate for an unrelated reason.

knock knock. who's there? Kony. Kony who? Kony says:" Uganda be abducted"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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