Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? A: Ele PHa n T

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What Do you call a black priest? Holy shit!

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What do you call a white guy sitting on a bench? The NBA.

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Have you heard of the dog that sounds like Megan fox? No Oh, well ummm apperantally there's this ummm dog that sounds like Megan fox. So ummm yeah. Pretty interesting stuff

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Sir, your wife is dead

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Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

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Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by a giant elephant.

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Terminator XXXIVXXX Regensisysydioniosis. Watch as the terminators return in this year`s summer blockbuster, they return to a time before the birth of Connors grandfather and manage to destroy the world, then the only decision left is for humanity in another timeline to travel back as the terminators are destroyed, but they travel back again so that! But that wont happen before Terminator: Los Pollos Hermanos.

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RIDE A PONY, RIDE A PONY

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-Knock! Knock! -Who's there? -Bob. Is Brian's here? -Wrong adress. Brian's home is the first one at your right. -Oh sorry. Have a nice day.

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roses are red violets are microwaves i have amnesia what ma name iiizzz 'SHAWTAY

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What did the T-Rex say to the caveman? Nothing. Tyrannosaurus Rex was a prehistoric land animal that roamed the Earth roughly 65 million years before the appearance of man. Making such a conversation impossible.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his wife in the hospital. She has terminal cancer.

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A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

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A Mexican man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "haven't you got a damaged liver?" The Mexican replies "haven't you got a job to do?" The Mexican died 2 seconds later

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Why did the man lose the spelling bee? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

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Person1: Man I had the worst day ever. Person2: Worser than the holocaust.

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Why does the same anti-jokes pop up over and over again? Because people have no creativity.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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A Chinese man, an Italian man and a French man are sitting in a plane. They arrive in Los Angeles with a 23 minute delay due to atmospheric conditions

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What is big, round, hairy, black with a little bit of white and red stripes, large feet, small hands, squinty eyes and a purple beret? Nothing. How ridiculous.

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Man: Hey honey! you look mighty fine today! Want to go play some lax? Woman: I'd love to! Thanks babe! Man: Just kidding you are a woman.

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What is six foot three, plays basketball, and is black? A black dog with basketball skills and takes steroids.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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