Yo momma is so ugly that she should probably consider suicide

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I never drink liquor alone... except for when I'm alone.

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Why did the lemon eat salt? I DON'T KNOW!!

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A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

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My friend thought that an onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I threw a watermelon at his face.

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do you know what was a good idea? not last night

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Did you hear about the Asian boy that entered the piano competition? He died yesterday.

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If the joke below mine says something about a mom its from adam he sucks ...

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What do you call black people in a church, Holy shit

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why do people put their pants on in the morning? because their not nudists.

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hi mom

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what did the banana say to the orange? nothing because a banana is a fruit

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Why did the gay guy go in the bar? To find some hookers

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Your mother is so fat, we needs two fat jokes to adequatly make fun of her.

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What happen to the man who got drunk and passed out behind the wheel? He crashed into a tree, his car caught fire and then he got incinerated.

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What did the two Japanese men say to each other? I have no idea I don't speak Japanese

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Why did the black man enjoy KFC. Because like many foods, it contains monosodium glutamate (MSG) a flavor enhancer that makes many foods taste better. It however had nothing to do with race or cultural background.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Sara

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Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

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Knock knock? Who's there? You have cancer.

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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What ever happened to Sally? We don't know she went missing over 5 years ago.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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