GO CHARLIE TO CANDY MOUNTAIN. Charlie is a unicorn and unicorns are not real they are mythological creatures. They do not breath becuase they where never alive unless you do drugs(mr craig) that is the only way to see them. And drugs leed to lose of money, loss of money = broke.Broke = no home. No home= death. So who believes in unicorns??

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Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

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What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a bar? Hahaha you walked into a bar. What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a pub? AHH-JOOOOO!!!

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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Why was the asian a bad driver? Because while he was driving a leprechaun was punching him in the face.

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What has hands but isn't alive? A dead person.

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What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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Why did Jim get hit by a train? Because he was standing in the tracks.

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whats big red and eats bricks a big red brick eater

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I've never seen a zebra use that crossing.

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Q:What did the Hulk say before the bartender refused to serve him further drinks? A: HULK SMASHED! Moral: "THE MORE DRUNK THE HULK GETS! BLURRIER HIS VISION BECOMES! HULK IS THE BLURRIEST THERE IS!"

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What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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How do you get a blonde's number? You ask her, but she probably won't give it to a loser like you.

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Q: Why did the man cross the road? A: Cause he felt like it.

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What did the Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know. I can't speak Chinese.

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what is red and smells like paint red paint

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How did Billy tip the cow? He didn't, cows are animals and that would be wrong.

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Knock knock.

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What did the cripple wish for when he saw the shooting star? A toothbrush.

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a Gay Man Walks Into A Bar And See's its Only Women In There, He Screams And Leaves

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What do Justin Bieber and Eminem have in common? They both need to get a life. I lied about Eminem.

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A guy walks into a bar. He loses conciseness because of the force of the metal bar hitting his skull.

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Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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