Three midgets walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer, the second one orders whiskey, and the third one ordered water because all three of them had agreed that he would be the designated driver that night.

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If Waldo and Carmen Sandiego had a child it would be fictional.

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What's worse than having no coffee at the office? Looking out the window on the 100th floor and seeing the cockpit of a Boeing 767.

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what did the cow say to shabab?....... want some milk

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whats worse then getting sat on by a hippo getting sat on by Matt Ross

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? because she had no arms. --- Knock, Knock Whos there? Not Sally.

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What does "Ford" stand for? Nothing. It's the name of the company founder, not an acronym.

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Teacher: Pop quiz time class. Sally, what year did we first land on the moon? Sally: It was 1969. Teacher: That is correct. Larry, who killed JFK? Larry: What? I didn't do it, I wasn't even born yet! Teacher: Just answer the question Larry: But sir, I swear I would never do that. You have to believe me. Teacher: Larry, you're an idiot

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Who's the best player in Madden 07 on the PS2? Michael Vick.

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What's worse then failing a test. Being raped by a horse

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Why did the cow fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second cow fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first cow.

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Q.what do you call a dead baby? A. a dead baby

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a fetish for sniffing your shoes.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he!

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Anonymous. Anonymous who? Exactly.

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(To the pretty girl at the bar) "Was your father a thief? Because I really would like to have sexual intercourse with you."

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What is Rebecca Blacks favorite resurant? T.G.I Fridays...

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What did the chicken do? He crossed the road.

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Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius!

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What do you call a dolphin mixed with a cheetah? I have no idea I was hoping you knew.

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What's white and gluey Glue

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What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

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Man hears son masturbating in room. The dad enters the room and tells him "Son if you keep jacking off you will go blind". The boy replies "Dad I"m over here".

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what do u say when u meet somebody new hello

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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