Why did grandpa climb the phone pole with bananas in a backpack? He has a debilitating disease. He is slowly losing touch with reality.

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why doesnt john lipka have a job? because the unemployment rate is high these days.

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What did the rapist say to the child? Contrary to popular belief, I am just a kind old man that likes to hand out sweets to disadvantaged young children. I only got dubbed a rapist when a child crawled into the back of my van as I drove off; the fact that his abusive father was the one who raped him is not my fault.

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Why did Biggie Smalls eat so much dark chocolate? His doctor suggest that he eat foods high in fiber.

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What do you call a man with no arm or legs lying in front of a door? Idk, but how did he get there, and where is his aid to help him get out of this situation?

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Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

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Robert Mugabe.

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Whats worse than the Holacaust? Stepping on damn Lego's. MrBounty44

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What's black and blue and is scared to death? the kid in my trunk

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Q: What is usually black , is a rectangle and has two circles? A: An i pod touch 4

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How can you tell if your wife is dead? She won't have a pulse.

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Q: John gets attacked with a chainsaw, how many stitches does he get? A: None, Hes dead jim

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This is one LONG empty space isn't it?

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Q: What do you call a Polish astronomer? A: Copernicus.

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THAT'S RIGHT, BEST INVISIBLE PAINT I EVER BOUGHT. LOOK WHAT A GREAT JOB IT DID ON THIS PAGE YEAH! I RECKON IT IS THE BEST INVISIBLE PAINT I EVER DIDN'T SEE

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Knock Knock Who's there? Boo. Boo Who? Boobies.

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What did hitler get for christmas??? Roughly 3 million dead jews in the ashtray

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A man walks into a bar he's drunk and can't feel it But he's ok

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Doctor! Doctor! Everyone seems to be stealing things! Piss off, I am a doctor not a detective you prick.

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Johnny had 100 chocolate bars. He ate 95 and gave 3 to his friend. What does Johnny have now? Diabetes

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What do you say to a cashier? How much is it?

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why did the baseball player strike out? he forgot the bat

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a blonde does something stupid. she dies. its funny.

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Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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