- Anti Joke

A lesbian couple, a straight couple, and a gay couple walk into a bar. They enjoy their drinks and camaraderie.

If one train is heading North at 60 mph, na danother train is heading South at 45 mph, how many waffles are on the roof? The answer is purple, because aliens like coffee.

A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are about to be executed by a firing squad. Before they shoot the brunette, they ask if she was any last words. “Look, a tornado!” Then they shoot her.

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

What did the physicist say when he got his penis stuck in a test tube? Ah jeesh! I got my penis stuck in a test tube.

whats yellow and cant swim? A bulldozer

What did the Black women tell her Asian boyfriend in bed Nothing because they don't talk when they are sleeping

Why did the chicken cross the road? Certainly not to have its motives questioned!

Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero Because it's impossible.

Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

How do you get a mexican to do the yard work faster? Offer him a 5% bonus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

roses are red violets are blue polar bears are white grass tends to be green

What would Ronald Reagan say if he was alive today? Nice to meet you my name is Ronald Reagan

why don't bears wear shoes? because they have bear feet

Yo momma so stupid, she failed the 2nd grade math

"Knock Knock" "Just ring the bloody bell for once!"

Q. Whats worse than 9 babies in 1 suitcase? A. 1 baby in 9 suitcases.

What made the old man laugh? A pile of dead babies.

A man walks into a bar. He gets drunk, goes home, and beats his wife and kids.