1: I heard a great knock knock joke, but you have to start it. 2: Okay, knock knock! 1: Who's there? 2: ???

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Knock knock Who's there? *silence* WHO'S THERE? *silence* -Looks out window- Slenderman

thumb_up thumb_down -28

How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Q: GUESS WHAT IS REALLY BAD????? A: TITTY CANCER! :0

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? A porcupine has it's pricks on the outside. A BMW doesn't have pricks on it's bodywork, for a multitude of reasons: - it would increase the coefficient of drag, causing an increase in fuel consumption - the pricks would fall foul of pedestrian safety regulations

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why was the drunk person arrested? He said to a police officer "I'm gay, so shut up you b****."

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's even better than finding 10 bucks in your pocket? Getting into heaven.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Q: What has 2 eyes and 2 halves of pigs' snout? A: Two pigs peeking around a corner.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

There once was a man from Nantucket. He lived a long, full life. Outside of Nantucket. But he visited occasionally.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What do you call an horse? A horse, because horse does not start with a vowel and that would be grammatically incorrect.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

what did the captcha response say to the man? ofdorno which.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Whats green and has wheels? Grass...i lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A. Why did the boy cross the road? B. Why? A. I don't know! That's why I'm asking you.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's big and green and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A snooker table

thumb_up thumb_down -30

How do you stop a baby from spinning round a washing line. Hit it in face with a baseball bat.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Let them think that you are insane, vulnerable, and they wont bother leaking a lot of shit about you, this "shit info" will remain inaccurate and reveal weaknesses where there is none. I had to draw them away from you, but as soon as he began selling Intel regarding my missing eye, I figure our "not so friends in the unknown" would have eventually begun searching for "The one eyed man" among you. And had they not found one, they might just as likely made it seem as if there was one for the money. None of the thugs sent to attack me nor the "Nero decoys" where professionals, but those behind them sure are, considering that they paid these thugs more than what I make during a year. Gotta go pretty girl, hope we meet again in not so long. Moral: This is all a joke, get over it, Moral has left forever, mission complete.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's the difference between michael jackson and casey anthony? Michael jackson's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did the girls hair catch on fire her neighbor bullied her

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Roses are blurred Violets too I have astigmatism I cant see shit

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being chased by a serial rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did Johnny throw the clock out the window? His parents are never around to supervise him.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

whats worst then dieng in a videogame

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops