What did the hammer say to the screwdriver? You're a tool

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Two bars walk into a guy, and the bartender says, "You're telling the joke wrong, stupid!"

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WHo owns a white van? JOSH!!

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Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

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your mom's stupid face is a dumb butthead. I hate you.

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A cat walks into a bar. She belongs to the owner, so he gives her a saucer of milk.

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What did the bride do on her wedding day? Get married.

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Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

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Whats black and hanging from a tree in my backyard? A tire swing

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The fox said to the walrus, "Hatee-hatee-hatee-ho!" And the walrus replied, "Goo-Goo-g'joob".

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Why did the man laugh? Because humans laugh when they hear a joke.

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whats worse than a bee sting, two bee stings, whats worse than two bee stings, the holocaust, whats worse than the holocaust, tree bee stings...

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I was going to write a joke about procrastination, but I haven't gotten to it yet.

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your momas so stupid she s going back to school to become a responsible adult

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Knock knock Who's there Bill Bill who? Bill Thompson

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Q: What do you call a gay dinosaur? A: Mega-saur-ass

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What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

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A man walks into a police station with a gun... He is there to turn it in, he found it on the side of the road and realized that this situation would best be handled by the proper authorities.

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What's the difference between Asians and buckets? I don't use Asians to scoop water out of the lake.

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what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

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How many moose does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, it is biologically and theoretically impossible for a moose to climb a ladder and screw in a light bulb.

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What did the Polish man say to his doctor? "Witam, doktorze. By?em kaszel z ostatnich kilku tygodni i jest wysypka na moim lewym ramieniu. Czy jest co? co mo?na zrobi?, aby mi pomóc?" I don't know what it means, either.

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Why did the man enter the fridge? He was hot Why is the man not in the chicken shop Hes in the fridge

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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