Roses are brown Violets are brown Someone keeps shitting in my garden

How do you find a true idiot jump in the road when the light is green.

What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one turns to the second, and says nothing, because muffins can't talk. They then both die because the temperature in the oven was 370 degrees.

why was six afraid of seven? prison changes a person

Thats so awesome, I was totally not not going to tell you and when I saw I did not not type it I totally did it anyways, but why did it last even though stuff timed out? I am like so wet.

roses are red, violets are red, ive been shot in the eye with a pelet gun, please ,please help

Did you hear that the actress, Reese what's-her-name, got stabbed to death? Witherspoon? No, with a knife.

A man walks into a bar

What"s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

What's Hitler's favorite beverage? Soda! Not Juice (jews) you asshat!

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BOOBS BOOBS BOOBS BOOBS BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOBSSSSSSSS!

What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? names.

What's the sexiest thing on a farm? It depends on what you find sexy, and your personal perception of a farm.

What did the boy eat for lunch? - His mother.

I've got some good news an some bad news. The good new is that you just won 10 million dollars! The bad news is I'm just kidding.

What did the tiger say to the monkey? Nothing really, just a lot of growls and other sounds as he consumed it.

A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

Why did the monk shave his head? So he's more aerodynamic.

Yo mama's so white that she has to use lots of sunscreen to prevent from getting sunburned.

Why did Shakespeare die? It's called life.

joe: guess what. Bob: what. Joe: nothing I just wanted to talk

Q: Why is it when geese fly in a V that one side is longer than the other? A: There are more geese on that side.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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