What's tiny and smells like a big banana? A tiny banana

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What do you call a secret agent that lives in a bottle of washing up liquid? Bubble-0-7

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how do you keep a black kid from jumping on the bed? pick up a parenting book ask him nicely try a time out not care because he's a kid and hes supposed to jump on beds?

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this is a haiku i have no idea where i am going with .... this

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a depressed alcoholic drug addict whose children had all been diagnosed with a rare form of terminal brain cancer, and he decided to end it then and there by jumping in front of an approaching bus.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go home and beat his wife

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The philosophy professor decided to isolate himself in his closet until he figured out the meaning of life. After ten years, he had done it. He came out of isolation and immediately found one of his former colleagues on campus. He said, "I've discovered the meaning of life!" The colleague said, "Ok, what is it?" The professor said, "Life is like a bridge." The colleague said, "How so?" After a few moments, the professor nodded and said, "Yea, I guess you're right."

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1:Your reading my text. 2:Your wondering what the point is. 3:Your getting angry. 5:Your going to click thumbs down. 6:But wait! You didn't realize that there was no number 4. 7:Your checking it. 9:Your smiling. 10:Your smiling so much you forgot to check for number 8. 11:Your checking it. 12:Jokes on you.

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why did the doctor go to jail? he was found guilty of the murder and rape of a 6 year old boy.

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really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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How many Azheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

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What do you say to a cat with a helmet on? Silly cat, you rhyme with hat but you shouldn't wear one.

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How do you put 100 kids on a girls face ? skeet

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A man fell in a hole. He's dead now...

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what is another way to say tree? A big stick with leaves

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How many dead guys does it take to build a shed? None. The contractor did it for 40 dollars an hour using maple wood.

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You know what would be funny? If the Incredible Hulk asked Spiderman to change his diaper.

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What is worse than braking a fingernail, Learing that a clown raped your entire family

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What did the black guy do when he heard sirens? He Ran

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What is more black than a Nigerian marathon runner? The night sky

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Yo mama's so ugly, She cured cancer.

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whats sad about 3 black people driving a Cadillac over a cliff? that was my Cadillac

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Whats red and smells like black paint Red paint

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops