why did the goose lay an egg? because it was pregnant .

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, in fact, the "road" in this joke symbolizes the Mexican/American border. The chicken's real name is Esteban Jimenez and he crossed the "road" to reach his family on the other side so he can start his life over. In addition to this, Esteban's real dream was to establish a 401k and possibly go to law school so he could begin his own law firm.

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What do you call a Muslim woman driving a plane? First, you don't "drive" planes you "fly" them. Second, you should address her as Ma'am, Captain, or Pilot.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

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Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one at the bottom.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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What's better than having a baby in your fridge? Almost anything.

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How do you stop a puppy from barking in the front yard? Put him in the backyard.

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What is obama's favorite place to eat? Subway

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My nipple is bleeding

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Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

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nik nak paddy wack give the dog a breathalyzer test

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Q:why did the chicken cross the road. A:to get back to the farm he was raised on

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Why did Superman not stop the planes on 9/11? He was quadroplegic.

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So much oil was spilled into the ocean that it is killing animals.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing... she's ugly

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cock was on the other side.

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Why did billy go to the beach? To spread his moms ashes on the sand.

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why couldn't hellen keller drive becasue she was a women

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What is worse than a worm in you're apple? Two worms in you're apple.

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What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was tomato...

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Why didn't Bill go to the party? He wasn't invited.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops