Knock Knock! Who's there? The police, your father just died in a boat accident.

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What's the difference between a book and a house? Their names

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What do you call a big hungry duck? A duck thats hungry and big

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Why couldn't Sammy ride a Bicycle? -Because Sammy is a Fish

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What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

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What do you call a black man standing on a sidewalk? Preferably race shouldn't matter in this situation, but in most social circumstances the man would be described as black to elucidate the person being depicted.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? This joke.

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How many shots do you have to take to start feeling light-headed? Ask JFK.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

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Nerochan, it was really nice chatting with you, I hope we can chat some other time... Please tell me why you are upset with me, just pick up the phone, I mean let me know what I did you wrong.

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Why'd the black man smell awful... Because he hadn't showered in multiple days

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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Why was 7 afraid of 6, because 6 raped 5

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Q: How do you count the population of Mexico? A: Take a census.

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Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

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Knock knock Go fuck yourself

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A grammatically correct mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve mushrooms." The mushroom says, "Why not, I'm a fungus."

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Why did the really unfunny man buy AntiJoke The Book??? It was a good deal and only $9.99.

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What do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

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what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

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what do u say when u steal something? STOLEN!!!!!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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