Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow Plants come in different colors

How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

I made a friend today. His name is don. He poops burritos. I like burritos.

A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. Just kidding. He's paralyzed

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

What makes the world go round? Gravity.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer dragged him.

there was an owl, she had a baby, threw up, then died

Your mom.

4 African men walk into a convientent store, withdrawal 50$ from there primary bank accounts and buy gas for the ride to there jobs at McDonalds

WOMEN'S RIGHTS

Whats white and cant jump? A refridgerator.

Roses are gray Violets are gray I'm a dog

How many midgets can you fit into a telephone booth? Well, it really depends on a lot of factors. The size and design of the phone booth itself is pretty important. Also, midgets really have a wide range of sizes, but we could do some analysis and find out the average at least. Based on that we could have an estimate done soon.

Like my status for a tbh?

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? ........Because he was severely scared when he witnessed a stray dog bleeding out

What did the man say to the other man? Nothing, they didn't know each other..

The street outside of my house is covered in jelly. I have done this.

Jews who wear penny loafers...

a mexican is walking through the desert with no food or water, and no clothes. he'll probably die soon.

Two guys walk into a bar, a spanish guy and a black guy. They get some drinks, call a taxi to arrive home safe. And kiss their wives and kids goodnight. They go to bed early after reading a wallstreet journal. And wake up early so they can both go to their jobs as college professors. To white kids.

why does renee suk at tetris? i dont know thats why im asking

Q: How did the girl in high school become so popular? A: She got pregnant

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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