What did Tarzan say when he took out his knife? I took out my knife.

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Look at your hand. Made you look!

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I used to work at a lightbulb factory... I made the filaments

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Women's Rights...

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what did the girl say when she got a ring? OHHH look i got a ring!

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What do you call a really bad actor? Nicholas Cage

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So there were two palm trees on an island. The first palm tree says to the second, "Hey! What's up?" The second one replies, "Nothing much, just chilling." Except they were actually ice cubes.

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Women deserve equal rights... April fools.

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What's big? Jupiter.

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a child and his father were on a bike ride the child tried to cross a street but was run over by a truck. His father now lives homeless and griefs his dead son.

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A mountain goat walks into a bar, the bar man asks ''what will it be?''. The other customers question the mental integrity of the bar man, as goats cannot talk

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why couldn't hellen keller drive becasue she was a women

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the city on the other side. He hoped he could find work in one of the city's cheap factories. He needed money for his family: he could not bear to see them slowly starve for any longer. If he could get a lowly-paid job he may be able to just sustain them. But he knew it could not last for long. He would probably die on the streets or in the slums, cold, lonely and starving. But it was a risk worth taking - he could not see his own family waste slowly away like so many of his friends had.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Chris Hanson with To Catch A Predator.

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Are you from Tennessee? Cause Jamaican me crazy.

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Your mama is so fat... she really should go on a diet.

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What do you call a black man in an expensive car? A licensed driver.

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What's the difference between a bucket of shit and a black guy? -the bucket.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To kiss my ass

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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How many stripes does a Zebra have? Doesn't matter millions of people died in the Holocaust

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Nice legs....What time do they open?

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Lacrosse is the best sport in the world

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What's white and red all over? A baby in a blender

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops