What's white and red all over? A baby in a blender

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Joshua Brown was in a dark forest, with a misty haze surrounding him. He turned quickly and flicked his hair out of his face. Dylan Hodge appeared and they had wild sex all night!

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Did you hear the one about the kinky dominatrix? No. Damn. I really wanted the details.

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What do you call a pencil made entirely of steel? I dont know, i dont name my pencils.

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What's worse then finding out that your partner has AIDS? I don't know actually, but finding out would suck pretty bad...

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Knock knock whos there? me oh, cool... well come in.

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Why was the orphan crying? Because his parents are dead.

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Man 1: youre going to die Man 2: why? Man 1: everyone dies

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What do you do when you fall asleep? You sleep.

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What's the difference between Lady Gaga and the Bogeyman? Nothing.

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What is the secret to losing weight? Limb Amputation.

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Whats massive, long, hard, cold, and is blue? A penis in an ice cube.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? ...Finding the same joke int he Inti-Joke.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because not only was she deaf and dumb, but she was also blind and it's not possible to drive if you are blind.

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does your face hurt? yeah, neither does mine.

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How did the osprey find the fish? He searched for it.

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Why did the catholic priest go to jail He was a paedophile

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second and says "it sure is getting hot in here!". The second muffin looks over and responds "this makes no sense - we shouldn't be capable of speech, let alone self-awareness." "We probably should try to get out of here, though."

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What do you call a grizzly bear without teeth? A gummy bear

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Hey, you have small hands.

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What's the difference between a Porche and a Pile of dead babies? I don't have a Porche in my garage.

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I used to work at a lightbulb factory... I made the filaments

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When does the baby talk When you remove ypur feet from its mouth

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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