a man walks into a bar and dies

How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

what are you eating under there? oh a sandwich, its actually really good.... want a bite? yea thanks! yum yum

what did the homeless boy do when he saw a cup of water? threw it in someones face

Your Momma's so ugly that if she got plastic surgery she would probably look better

Why can't Sally ride her bike? Because Sally is eight months old and doesn't even understand what a bike is.

What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing because they are on opposite sides of the earth

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? ...Finding the same joke int he Inti-Joke.

What's cooler than ice ? Liquid oxygen.

How do you stop a bus? Wait at the bus stop and it will stop for you.

a man is found hanging from the ceiling of a barn and there is no chairs or anything to stand on around. his girlfriend goes in to deep depression and kills herself the next week.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Madame. Madame who? Just kidding it's Steve, but my damn foot's stuck in the door.

Q - Want to hear a joke? A - Me Too.

ha do call a by with red heir a freckles? ginger

What's black and white and red all over? A bleeding penguin.

WHY did the man refuse to put on his shoes? He didnt want shoes on

A man went in for a doctors appointment and said, "Doc, it hurts when I do this." The doctor responded, "Try to abstain from from putting stress on that area. It might alleviate the pain a bit."

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? One walks on the moon and the other f*cks little boys.

Three postmodernists walk into a bar. The barman says "What's this, some kind of anti joke?"

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Somebody call animal control, there's a horse in the bar." The horse is then taken away and made into glue and dog food.

A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

What do you call a joke with no punchline?

How did the man rob the bank? With a gun

i went to have a wank over anime as well yesterday, the i realised i dont have a penis. -adam fantuzzi

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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