Cnorris can carry very heavy objects

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Two men walk into a bar. And they enjoy a good night of drinking beer and playing pinball.

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What did the police officer say to the boy in the park? your parents were killed in a car accident.

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Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

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did the dog explode? because it didn't have a bum hole

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why is your mom crying? i don't know but you should be nice and offer your support.

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The Mets win the World Series

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how do you torched helen Keller? put her Ina round room and tell her the bathroom is around the corner

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Last Christmas, I gave you my heart but your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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Knock, knock Who's there? Landlord; you've been evicted.

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What did the three-leaf clover say to the four-leaf clover? "FREAK!"

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Have you heard the one about the drunk cleaning lady? I haven't either but I bet it is good. That is a pretty good premise for a joke.

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here kitty kitty

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Your Mom.

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Why did German "shower heads" have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers.

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Who looks like Zach Efron? Shrek.

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How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

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Freeza: I am the strongest in the universe! (if you ignore my brother Coola which is much stronger and all...) Goku: You have pissed me off now Freeza, I will now turn into a super Asian and prove to the world that real Asians are actually blonde and blue eyed! (I am sure Goku means Sayans, which is "completely different") Goku: HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARG! Freeza: Omg, he... he... is trying to take a dump! IMPOSSIBLE! I will have to find his balls and caress them... Will Goku ever take a shit? Or reach all new levels of constipation during the series? Find out in the next episode of dragon ball z!

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Why couldn't the car drive? Because its wheels were made of butter.

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Do u know what would be a big pain in the ass? A thorn

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What is the difference between a rose and a grape? They are both purple.

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Knock knock. Who's there? George Washington. George Washington who? George Washington Carver.

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Why dont you ever see any black mermaids? Mermaids dont exist.

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Hey, is that your corvette. No I thought it was yours.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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