What was Michael Jackson doing at the Dermatologist's office? He was getting a mole on his back examined to be sure it wasn't cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are red, Violet are blue, This is Sparta, I am a chair

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks. The first blonde said, "Those are deer tracks." The second blonde said, "No, those are elk tracks." The third blonde said, "You're both wrong, those are moose tracks." They were moose tracks.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate poems Penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you make a small fortune? Be financially smart, work hard, save money, all while you make sure you don't let your earnings become a "large" fortune.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to she him rocking and rocking on it.(:

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Me: What as 9595 legs,3500 eyes and 9894 teeth? You: I dont know... Me: Me neither,but its on your leg.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A priest, a rabbi, and a preacher walk into a bar. They ordered a water each.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q:why didn't billy go to soccer practice A:there was a billboard stapled to his neck

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: What do you get when you cross and owl with a bungie cord? A: My ass

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did Tyrone try to sell Timmy some blow? Due to his poor educational background, lack of recommendations, and a terrible job market, Tyrone wasn't able to get a real job and had to resort to selling illegal narcotics. This wasn't something Tyrone wanted to do, because he promised himself he would never end up like his father, but this was the only way he could support his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's longer - 'an african american phallus' or 'a micronesian sphincter'? 'An african american phallus has' 24 letters as opposed to 'a micronesian sphincter' at 21 letters, so it is longer.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A guy walks into a bar, and then orders a jack and coke.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what do you call it when a leopard starts losing its spots? leopard-osy! submitted by: pukey mcshakes

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why is your mom crying? i don't know but you should be nice and offer your support.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart but your body rejected the transplant and you died.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what do you call a muslim flying a plane 911

thumb_up thumb_down -1

The Bible

thumb_up thumb_down -3

guess what?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's worse than the Holocaust? Your Mom.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the mountain biker say when he saw a double rainbow? This a very rare occurrence in nature, and I should enjoy this rare phenomenon.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's my favorite color?? I don't have one, i'm a joke you idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How many dead babies can u fit in a bath tub 17

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops