If pro is the opposite of con . Is congress the opposite of progress?

thumb_up thumb_down -124

here's a joke: Ron Paul: Hope for America

thumb_up thumb_down +99

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food there.

thumb_up thumb_down +77

Q: What do you call a midget psychic who escaped from prison? A: His or her name.

thumb_up thumb_down +71

A man walks into kindergarden class with a beer. He then gets arrested.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

Q: What did the redneck say with missing front teeth? A: "I can only eat things with my back teeth and I have AIDS."

thumb_up thumb_down +63

what is the square root of pi? crust^2 + Cool Whip

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why did the white man win the race Because there were no black people attending

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why was the boy sad? Because his dog was brutally murdered and the man responsible painted his bedroom walls in the dogs blood.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall. First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? He was buried under 6ft of solid earth.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

a 12 year old walks into a bar she orders a drink and dies she then walks out of the bar

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer dragged him.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Whats white and cant jump? A refridgerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you call a chav in a box It depends what kind of a box If it is a coffin you call him dead If he is in a cardboard box you call him homeless It really just depends

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How do you get Jack to fall of his bike? Push him off

thumb_up thumb_down +25

whats the difference between a mexican and a black person? They have different skin colors.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Lets see how many dislikes this can get.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops