Oceanic flight 815 crashes on an island and the survivors are stranded. They all die of starvation and dehydration within a week.

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Why did the Russian take a boat ride? Well this isn't possible because we all know that in Soviet Russia, boat ride you.

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why couldn't sarah ride the bike? She had cerebral Palsy

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How do you make a small fortune? Be financially smart, work hard, save money, all while you make sure you don't let your earnings become a "large" fortune.

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Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? A mexican is a human being while a bench is an inanimate object.

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My cousins so stupid she makes straight A's

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A man walks into a bar... and gets hurt.

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What's worse than heartbreak? Getting run over by a steamroller.

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Rick Perry.

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Q. What do you call the person that graduated at the bottom of his medical department? A. Doctor

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''Wanna hear a joke?'' ''Sure'' ''a joke''

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what do you call a muslim flying a plane 911

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What's worse than the conservatives? Nothing, because conservatives fuck everything up.

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A goat goes to the store and asks the store clerk where the potatoes are. The clerk told the goat to check aisle 5 for the potatoes. The goat goes to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being mentally retarded.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

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Why won't sharks attack lawyers? Humans tend to fight back, and sharks wouldn't usually be so hungry as to endanger their own lives in this way. Besides, most places where humans swim have shark barriers.

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Q: How do you stop a baby from spinning in circles? A: Nail his other hand to the floor

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Your mother is so fat, she spends all day in her bedroom, eating chocolate and crying herself to sleep.

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Q. A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car. Who's driving? A. The police officer

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Why do some RVs have 2 doors? Because 11 would be too many.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have multiple personalities So do I

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How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

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Hey! i just thought of the funniest joke! okay so it goes like this: A man was walking down the street and saw a bar... he walked in and.... yeah, thats about it.....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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