do you want my comeback? its in your mums mouth

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What happens when you throw a red rock in a green pond? It sinks.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the little boy drop his Icecream? Because I ran him over with my Bus!!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A horse walked into a barn...

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

I know what makes young boys "explode" -dynamite

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the plane crash into the mountain? Because it was being piloted by a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Yo mama's so fat, she possesses a Body Mass Index that is above the recommended value for healthy individuals and thus will have a greater risk for heart disease and other related health problems.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a mummy that falls into the Nile? Wet

thumb_up thumb_down +4

...and the rabbit says, "How 'bout that schnitzel!"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How Many Blind People Does It Take To Solve A Rubiks Cube? None Their Blind

thumb_up thumb_down -4

whats worse then being lit on fire? dont worry about that right now your ass is on fire!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Are you from Tennessee? Cause Jamaican me crazy.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why couldn't hellen keller drive becasue she was a women

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you make a salesperson cry? Shoot him in the face and throw him off a cliff

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q:Where does a woman work at if she has 1 leg? A: IHOP!!! :)

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama find a magical lamp. The Genie says, "I will give each of you one wish, and one wish only.." They all wished to be presidents.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Boy: Knock Knock. Man: Who's there? Boy: Doctor. Man: Doctor Who? Boy: Haha! The man then invites the boy into his home, where he gives him a glass of lemonade laced with Ruphalyn. He then proceeds to take off the boy's clothes and rape him. When the boy awakes, the man starts to fear for the police discovering the boy in his home, so he kills the boy and cuts off his limbs and head, and buries the body parts in a hole in his backyard.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Three guys and 4 Catholics are in a bar. They guys are making a joke. The first one says I'm gonna go to Oregon there's no Catholics there and the second one says I'm gonna go to Ohio there is no Catholics there and the third one says I'm gonna go to Alaska there's no Catholics there and one of the Catholics walk up and say how about you go to hell theres no Catholics there.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was tomato...

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops