Q. What do you call a bear ripping a man to pieces? A. A bear.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

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Andrew Wang getting a girlfriend.

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Why did the kid want money? So he could buy pokemon cards.

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roses are red, Violets are blue, i have a gun, Suck my dick

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women's rights

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What do you call a really bad actor? Nicholas Cage

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what is the biggest lie in the universe? -click to enter only if you are 18

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Why was the girl crying at the dance? Someone shot her.

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What's gay and gay? Joe

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In the future... "Hey Apple! Hey, hey Apple!" "What the heck, Orange! You've been doing this for the last 10 billion years!"

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Whats similar between a plum and a rabbit? They are both purple, except for the rabbit.

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how do you torched helen Keller? put her Ina round room and tell her the bathroom is around the corner

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Roses are red Violets are blue

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The Theory of Relativity, proposed by the Jewish physicist Albert Einstein (1879-1955) in the early part of the 20th century, is one of the most significant scientific advances of our time. Although the concept of relativity was not introduced by Einstein, his major contribution was the recognition that the speed of light in a vacuum is constant and an absolute physical boundary for motion. This does not have a major impact on a person's day-to-day life since we travel at speeds much slower than light speed. For objects travelling near light speed, however, the theory of relativity states that objects will move slower and shorten in length from the point of view of an observer on Earth. Einstein also derived the famous equation, E = mc2, which reveals the equivalence of mass and energy. When Einstein applied his theory to gravitational fields, he derived the "curved space-time continuum" which depicts the dimensions of space and time as a two-dimensional surface where massive objects create valleys and dips in the surface. This aspect of relativity explained the phenomena of light bending around the sun, predicted black holes as well as the Cosmic Microwave Background Radiation (CMB) -- a discovery rendering fundamental anomalies in the classic Steady-State hypothesis. For his work on relativity, the photoelectric effect and blackbody radiation, Einstein received the Nobel Prize in 1921.

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Why did the baby stop crying? Mommy shook him.

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Female Athletics

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why did the chef go to jail? because he was caught beating an egg

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Whats worse then nailing ten babies to a tree? Nailing one dead baby to ten trees.

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"hey you know that graveyard down the street." "yeah." "people are dying to get in there."

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How many dead babies can u fit in a bath tub 17

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What's my favorite color?? I don't have one, i'm a joke you idiot.

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In Soviet Russia, people are dying of starvation.

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Q: What do you get when an angry black man walks past you. A: You get a promotion, the black guy was your friend Bob and he had just been suspended for failing to follow police protocol when apprehending a suspect.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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