In soviet Russia... there is a distinct probability that you will get mugged due to the high crime rate and gang ruled streets.

What did the young girl with leukemia say to a stranger? I am afraid

What's worse than a male chauvinist pig? A woman that won't do what she's told.

How many finger does a fat person have? I don't know you can never find there hands.

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Statutory Rape.

I've ben told to open all your windows when a tornado comes. Who told you THAT? A guy who opened all his windows when a tornado came.

Why did Suzy drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy!

Why was the little boy's head so big? He had a tumor in his brain.

A man walked into a bar and was then taken away in an ambulance dude to a severe concussion.

What do you call an aircraft piloted by a Muslim extremist? The aircraft's brand name followed by its model number, in all likelihood.

There was a buffalo on a farm. The buffalo was slaughtered and then put and a package and sent to people who like the taste of slaughtered, chemical filled buffalo. In other words, people who like buffalo wings.

Your momma so fat she can eat 10 of your 300lb friends.

Winking at old people

Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

what color is blue? green

Hi Danny it's Louis Tehe

What's a four letter word that ends with "rape"? Stop.

How did the old man climb the hill? He didn't.

What did susan boyle say when she saw a 10 year old boy get hit by a bus? "OH MY GOD, SOMEBODY RING AN AMBULANCE"

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food there.

Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead.

What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a cheetah? Don't do that, I'm pretty sure it's illegal for several reasons.

Joey and Jack walked into a bar, and proceeded to have gay sex on the floor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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