A guy walks into a bar. The bar was closed. Tough luck.

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Like my status for a tbh?

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What did one duck say to the other? Well, it said "Quack" but it's not certain if it was actually addressing the other duck or if it was just making a noise in response to some other stimulus.

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What's worse than being mugged? Being raped by bulbasaur.

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What did the blind, deaf orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

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How many alzheimers patients does it take to change a light bulb? How many? How many alzheimers patients does it take to change a light bulb?

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What do you call a prostitute with no arms and legs? Unfortunate, as they've probably have many misfortunes in life.

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A man went in for a doctors appointment and said, "Doc, it hurts when I do this." The doctor responded, "Try to abstain from from putting stress on that area. It might alleviate the pain a bit."

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-Whats worse than a joke with no punch line? -What?...

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why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming, and felt compelled to get to its family

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The iPhone5. It's kinda Gay

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Somebody call animal control, there's a horse in the bar." The horse is then taken away and made into glue and dog food.

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How do make a boy cry? You cut off his eyelashes

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a picnic table? The average picnic table can support a family of four, while a Mexican person, depending on his or her career, can support families that include over four people.

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What happened to Kim when she went swimming? She didn't, she doesn't know how to swim.

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What did the handicapped boy say to his mother? Nothing, his severe mental retardation impaired his ability to learn the English language.

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Women's Rights...

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knock knock who's there? Tommy Tommy who? Tommy Smith from across the street, i just ran over your dog.

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There are 2 Muffins in an oven in a bakery. The first muffin says "Is it hot in here , or is it just me?" The other muffin says " We are going to die in here and no one will here us screaming."

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Guess what? SHADAP

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Q. Wherefore art thou Romeo? A. Global Warming. ,.

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Why was the boy hot? Because he was stuck in an oven.

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How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its head.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops