why couldnt the mexican jump the fence? He broke his leg.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

The.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What happened to the public server who went to the 5 dollar brothel? He contracted syphilis and died several months later.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Aaron Cummings is me. Find me on facebook:)

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Did you hear about the one with the priest, the boy, and the dildo? Yes, sadly I have.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

a guy walks into a bar. unexpectedly, a terrorist walks in and shoots him in the head. After lots of therapy he can now go back to his average life.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house knock knock Who's there THE CHICKEN

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What is white and can't walk? A PVC Pipe.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what do you get from sleeping with a hooker? An orgasm

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Do unto others as others would do unto you, said the rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Four guys are on an airplane. The plane lands safely and the four guys return to their families.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the boy with no arms get for christmas? Prosthetic arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

I used to make references to characters in Skyrim, but then my uncle touched me...

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's longer - 'an african american phallus' or 'a micronesian sphincter'? 'An african american phallus has' 24 letters as opposed to 'a micronesian sphincter' at 21 letters, so it is longer.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why are there so many jokes about people walking into bars? Bars are known as a place most people go to for a social occasion, making them a place that most people can relate with.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Nero, man, I mean I will hurt you, I am on my way to the hospital, and seriously that pic does not look real, seriously on a hospital? I mean man, I am really sorry! I nearly killed you, how was i supposed to know you do not care about your teeth and take half a bottle of that calcium stuff? My mom? Yeah sure! She laughed at the message you sent her, and if you touch my sis, ill kill you, anyway I am on my way, you better change your mind or I will kick your ass!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A Horse walks into a bar. So the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The Horse replies "My jockey raped me".

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than having but sex and finding out you have aids? Knowing that the person you had sex with was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the racist guy say at the baseball game? I am at a baseball game.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A young girl walks into a dark alley. She emerges a few minutes later unharmed and goes about her day.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

how do you get mhairi mcdonald to shut up? rip out her throat.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops