How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Why do they call it lunchmeat? Because it is meat that you eat at lunch.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

What's brown? My toilet hahaha

thumb_up thumb_down -64

Where did John go? Refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -102

What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a cheetah? Don't do that, I'm pretty sure it's illegal for several reasons.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

If a stick is sticky and a bat is batty, what is a mountain? A mountain is rocky. Techinically, 'mountainly' is not an official word.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Hola.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

What's the difference between a duck? I'm sorry, I was typing too quickly and missed off the end of my sentence. I meant to say "What's the difference between a duck and a goose?" and the answer is that they are entirely different species of waterfowl.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding cancer on your back

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Q: So why does an Asian guy look at these two black guys and a white woman in the middle? A: Because he wants an oreo cookie.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What do u get when you cross Napoleon and a stick of dynamite? A very bloody mess.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Want to hear a joke? Justin Bieber

thumb_up thumb_down +45

A: Knock Knock! B: Whos there? A: Its the f**king cops we have you surrounded.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

On the fifth day of Christmas my true love brought to me Nothing, because we only celebrate one day of Christmas

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

thumb_up thumb_down +41

a black guy with rights in 1924

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Barack Obama walks into a KKK meeting. Everyone in the meeting is shocked, and no one says a thing out of sheer embarrassment because racism is no longer socially acceptable.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What is the secret to losing weight? Limb Amputation.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

a man is found hanging from the ceiling of a barn and there is no chairs or anything to stand on around. his girlfriend goes in to deep depression and kills herself the next week.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops