Q: What is creepy and stares at you when you sleep A: Me

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One penguin says to another penguin, "It looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other penguin says, "Yea, I have to go to dinner party later."

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what is the square root of pi? crust^2 + Cool Whip

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Q:Which side of a chicken has more feathers? A:The outside.

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How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

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A Man visits his Doctor because he is feeling slightly unwell.

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A bear walks into a bar. Mauls every one in it, then is shot to death by animal control.

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What's the last thing that went through John F Kennedy's head? a bullet

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Put it in the microwave

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? STOLEN! You're under arrest.

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What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

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Why did Johnny fall off his bike? He was shot.

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there was an owl, she had a baby, threw up, then died

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whats blue and doesnt like cheese? the sky, i was only messing about the cheese

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Your mom.

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whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

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three men walked into a bar, the fourth one ducked

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What is bad at catch The twin towers

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The AIDS patient was gay

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How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bar was closed. Tough luck.

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Boy: Hey, guess who likes you. Girl: Who? Boy: NOBODY!!!!!!!!

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Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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