-How do you befriend Tom Hanks? -Kidnap his son

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Why doesn't Santa have any children? Because Santa doesn't exist.

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knock knock. who's there myfeth myfeth who myfether came off

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One penguin says to another penguin, "It looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other penguin says, "Yea, I have to go to dinner party later."

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what did the black kid get for Christmas? your bike

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock-eater.

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Who was the dinosaurs favorite NBA player? He didnt have one. Dinosaurs became extinct far before the NBA was established.

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A duck walks into a bar and says he needs to buy a hammer. The bartender tells him that he's probably looking for the hardware store across the street. The duck realizes that he's disoriented again and should listen to his wife's many pleadings to get back on his medication.

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Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because he doesn't want to be spotted

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I made a friend today. His name is don. He poops burritos. I like burritos.

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Why did the priest molest the small boy? Because he can.

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A jew, a black man, an Irishman, a Scotsman, an Englishman, an American, and a muslim walk into a bar. They discuss their racial, political and religious opinions and walk away after a pleasant evening.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a car? A lot.

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America Votes

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Who's better than badboy? The holocaust.

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A black man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and chats with his work friends. Then he goes home to his loving family.

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Your mother is so fat that she will die relatively early because of poor health.

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Q: What happens when you eat all the potatoes A: They are all gone

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What's cooler than ice ? Liquid oxygen.

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when two guys walk in somewhere late together you say. hay perv hay ert.

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what did the kid say when the bully took his ice cream nothing the bully punched him in the face first.

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what do u call a black person a black person dehh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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