What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

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A: Knock Knock! B: Whos there? A: Its the f**king cops we have you surrounded.

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What do you call burt and ernie if they were black?? A couple of n*ggers

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Your mother is so stupid that it would be politically incorrect and socially unacceptable to make asinine, derogatory comments about her challenges.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a car? A lot.

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A man comes home from work and find his wife in bed with another man. They realize that they have grown apart over the past few years, and start attending therapy in an ultimately unsuccessful attempt to reconnect with each other.

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your mama smells so bad she should probably go take a shower.

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Why did the priest molest the small boy? Because he can.

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What did the cow say to the farmer? 'Moo.'

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Why was the Librarian mad at the laughing kids?? they were laughing cause someone shot her.

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Why did the black guy not have friends He was socialy awkward

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How do you wake up Lady GaGa? You poke-poke-poker face

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Take my wife. . . . to the hospital. She is dying from a gunshot wound to the head.

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Your Momma's so ugly that if she got plastic surgery she would probably look better

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How Long is a Chinese man.

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A rabbi, a nun, and a homosexual walk into a bar. They proceed to get drunk, and party like its 1972. Oh yeah. And your dad was just killed by a refrigerator.

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why didn't the kid win the talent show? He wasn't talented.

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WOMEN'S RIGHTS

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Where did little Annie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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What's cooler than ice ? Liquid oxygen.

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What is worse than a little girl being raped by an old man? The accidental firing of nuclear weapons at the US and the US responding by launching nuclear missiles at an unknown enemy then assuming that targeting everyone will kill the enemy. Thus bringing an unprecedented and abrupt end to the world, in a cataclysmic nuclear holocaust. Leaving that little girl to be raped by mutated creatures - that survived the mass destruction - and eventually being consumed by those creatures.

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a man is found hanging from the ceiling of a barn and there is no chairs or anything to stand on around. his girlfriend goes in to deep depression and kills herself the next week.

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What is green, ugly and can't empty his bowels without exerting a tremendous amount of energy? A constipated, ugly, green thing.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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