Why did Tigger look into the toilet? He accidentally swallowed a dime the other day and wanted to keep an eye out for it.

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What is green and sticky and oozes up a kid's upper lip? A homesick booger.

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This is a joke for Homeless people:

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What do you call something round and red that tastes like a tomato and shoots through walls? A Super Tomato. And what do you call a banana that shoots through walls? A banana trying to be a Super Tomato.

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What can't think, see, hear, taste, or smell? A Headless Cat

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Why was the man killed before he could finish his anti joke? Because he

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Except, technically, violets are violet.

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Joey and Jack walked into a bar, and proceeded to have gay sex on the floor.

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Tim: Jason, your dumb Jason: No I'm not.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are being pursued by the cops. They run into an old barn for a place to hide. They each hid in a different potato sack. The cops enter the barn, and seeing no one, leave and continue the search somewhere else. The three girls flee the country and give up their life of crime. The cops later go get some donuts.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Wrong house. I apologize.

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Put it in the microwave

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what did the black kid get for Christmas? your bike

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Why did the boy pick up the baseball? He wanted to play baseball.

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How do you start a Mexican parade? You roll a quarter down a hill

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What is worse than a worm in your apple? The holocaust

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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Your Momma's so ugly that if she got plastic surgery she would probably look better

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A- Knock knock! B- Come in! A- ...

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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A Hindu, a Jew and a Muslim walk into a bar. They then proceed to brutally murder each other due to their strong religious differences.

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A whole family go to a water park. They have a great day.

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What do you call a black man without a job? A man disenfranchised by the failing American economy.

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Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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