What does Mickey mouse do every day? Minnie mouse

Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

Q: So why does an Asian guy look at these two black guys and a white woman in the middle? A: Because he wants an oreo cookie.

How do you keep your dog warm? Put antifreeze in its water dish.

It's funny, because she's twice his size!

how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

Q: What happens when you eat all the potatoes A: They are all gone

Why did the black guy not have friends He was socialy awkward

What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

What did Tarzan say when he say an elephant coming over a hill? Hey look, there's an elephant coming over a hill!

how do you own a ginger? you don't nobody wants them.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not sally.

Knock Knock Come in Thank you very much. Don't mention it. Would you like a home made spinach roll?

yo momma's so stupid that she can't support your family, because she can't get a steady job, meaning she does not have money to pay the bills or buy food. This also means you must now get food from your local food bank and sleep on the streets.

How do you kill a black guy? Shoot him in the temple

Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

A man went in for a doctors appointment and said, "Doc, it hurts when I do this." The doctor responded, "Try to abstain from from putting stress on that area. It might alleviate the pain a bit."

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

What did the snake say to the mouse? Nothing. The snake ate the mouse.

A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

a black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving the car? the owner of the car.

What did Jesus get for Christmas? Birthday presents.

What did the racist guy say at the baseball game? I am at a baseball game.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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