What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

A blonde went to a hair dresser's one day, listening to a walkman. The hair dresser asked her what she wanted, and the blonde replied, "I need to get my hair trimmed, just make sure that you do not take these headphones off." The woman looked at the blonde, surprised, but did as she was told. While she was brushing the blonde's hair, she accidentally bumped the headphones, knocking them to the ground. As she bent down to pick them up, the blonde fell over, onto the floor. The hair dresser was very confused. She picked up the head phones and listened. This is what she heard..."breath in...breath out...breath in...breath out..."!

What did the dog say to its owner? well as you can see it is physically impossible for a dog to speak english or any other langueges such as french, spanish or chinese.

Why did the babysitter only get paid 50 cents for a whole day. Because he was a 6 foot mexican.

why did the kids pull the fire alarm? because there was a fire.

Roses are blurred Violets too I have astigmatism I cant see shit

Oh, no! There is a ginger jew within 2 meters of me!

A lion, a tiger, and a bear walk down the side of the road. This is what I observed last week in a suburb of Columbus, Ohio.

What do you call a bad joke website? anti joke

yo momma so ugly that yo your birth certifiicate is an apology from thew condem factory

Knock Knock Who's there? A kind hearted serial killer who will win your heart emotionally and then shoot you to death unexpectedly.

Stop. Seriously stop.

When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

why did the homosexual man cross the road? to get to his gay partner.

What's worse than a bee sting? A katon.

Justin Port#$ falls out of a tree. What happens? he breaks his neck and unfortually dies a long painful death.

-knock knock! -doors open

Jesus saves, passes to Moses who shoots and scores!!!

Why was the plumber sad? Because his whole family died in a plane crash.

Knock Knock Who's there? Ben, you just called me. Aren't we supposed to go jogging. Oh yea, I lost track of time. Is it cold out? Yea it is. You should bring a jacket. Alright, can you get me a water? Yea, no problem. Thankyou.

You haven't happened to see a cigarette truck around here have you? What's a truck?

What did the woman with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A diagnosis.

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family

Your mother is so white that when she dances, she is off beat a little bit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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