How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a women.

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What did the blind, deaf, retarded kid get for Christmas? Spoiled.

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what do you call a black guy under water? A Scuba Diver

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Yo mama is so fat that she is in a diet and wants to lose weight by eating healthy.

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what do u say when u steal something? STOLEN!!!!!!!!!

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It thought they were playing follow the leader. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the little girl fall off her tricycle? She was hit by three monkeys and a refrigerator.

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why did the kid struggle in school? because hes mentally retarted

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What is worse than getting a cold ? Finding a dead baby in your mailbox

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What did the man say when he found a bar of soap in his mailbox? Why is there soap in my mailbox?

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A man walks into a bar. Oh, wait, no. It was a horse. So... A man walks into a horse

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What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

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whats similar between a chicken and an alligator they both gobble except for they alligator

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Whats better than winning an award? Not having your family shot to death

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot!

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Why did the man look in the mirror? To see his reflection.

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What's worse than being fired? Eating a bucket of diarrhea.

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That was totally mean! I mean I was in no way going to say any of that to you! Especially not the last part, sorry that must have been part of the suggestion or something, I barely ever tell myself stuff like that, I mean stop it okay? I mean I totally read it and all but I was all like "I am notnot typing that" please stop it, its humiliating.

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What did John name his dog? Doggy

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What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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