I accidentally solicited a prostitute today. I was driving in an iffy neighborhood and saw a woman on the sidewalk, so I stopped to ask if she could give me directions. She must have misheard me.

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why did the baby fall down the steps? Because there was big earth quake that blocked his parents on the other side of the house, therefor leaving no one capable of getting to him befor falling

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A devout Christian dies– Peter winks as his soul passes through the impenetrable Gates of Heaven. Everyone is gay and– like, gay as in happy– Homosexuals aren't allowed in.

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Do you know what's the sexiest thing in the world? Sex.

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what's pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheelchair

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What did the doctor tell his patient? Unfortunately you have cancer.

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there r three guys on a bridge. They r chinese,mexican,&american. They each have a bottle of beer. The chinese dude says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. Then the mexican says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. The american takes a drink of his and sets it down he looks at the mexican and says I have enough of these in my country and throws the mexican over the bridge.

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No pen- no notes No notes- no study No study- no good grades No good grades- no diploma No diploma- no job No job- no money No money- no food No food- really skinny Really skinny- ugly Ugly- no wife No wife- no kids No kids- lonely Lonely- death No pen=death

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What do you say to a confused blond? You help her with her conundrum.

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A man is driving the speed limit of 55 on the highway. He gets pulled over and the cop says, "Do you know how fast you were going sir?" The man replies "Well yes I was going 55, the speed limit." The cop says, "No you were going 80." The speedometers broken.

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I scream, you scream, we all scream when we're chased by bears.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a Sociopath with a very violent history.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? You don't, he just jumps down.

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How do you make a mess? Microwave a baby.

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What's the different between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my penis up your butthole

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What do you call a black man with big cuts on his arms? You call an ambulance to help him!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ....Because based on modern mathematics the shortest distance between two points is a straight line.

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what do you get when a penguin has a heart atack pengatack

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women's rights.

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Whats the difference between the Pope and acne Acne doesn't get onto a kids face until they're 13

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Q: What's big, black, and smelly? A: The unemployment line.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

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What's better than winning a gold at the paralympic Walking

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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