Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

whats red and brown and goes about 30mph? a squirrel in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

You know what is funnier than 24???? I don't know that's why I was asking

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

how does an Arab scare someone He does a countdown

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's worse than getting a papercut? Literally anything.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

thumb_up thumb_down -6

roses are red violets are blue I lost my dog to typhoid it was an unfortunate case of bed luck

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a man with a limp? A limping man.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What grows on trees and is woody? Wood.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the black man say to the other black man? Nothing, he was recently involved in a terrible car accident which he barely survived but lost the function of speech and was paralysed from the neck downwards. He is constantly in pain and desperately wants someone to kill him but has no way of communicating this so is forced to wait until his natural death.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call an apple, an orange, and a pear in a bowl? Fruit

thumb_up thumb_down -6

If your name is coincidentally stated in this text, you will have to pay 200 of your country's currency to the person nearest to you whose first name starts with the letter G. Dexter / Ryan That is all....

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's the difference between a Toyota Camry and 20 dead babies? I don't have 20 dead babies in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

So there's this guy, and he's trying to screw in a lightbulb, right? Well, he did it. Hoorah. His wife was proud.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the child with one arm shave his head? He is a swimmer.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A: Who are you? B: A random guy who walked into your house A: Oh sorry, I keep forgetting your name.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock Knock. In about 10 seconds you'll be trespassing on my property, I suggest you leave immediately. Your suppose to say who's there.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are red violets are blue, your library book is overdue, and if you dont pay the fine...i'll punch you in the mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A lady forgot to feed her goat. When she went to feed it, It wasn't there. Why? She didn't have a goat. Another lady forgot to feed her cat. When she went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? It died 2 days earlier. A man forgot to feed his cow. When he went to go feed it, it wasn't there. Why? They had ate it for dinner last night. A teenage boy forgot to feed his hamster. When he went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? He spent so much time playing video games that it ate itself. So the boy had his mom make him a sandwich.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the scientist go to the hospital? because he was experimenting with dangerous chemicals, and they exploded in his unsuspecting face. He doesn't have skin now.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a jam sandwich

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops