Why can't Hellen Kelller drive? Because she's a woman.

What is white but you can't see it? A bottle of milk around the corner.

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and wasting you money

Your mother is so fat that I would call her quite fat indeed.

yo momma is so fat that she contributes to americas obesity problem

Why do black people have nightmares? Because we killed the only one with a dream.

I don't drink. I'm not 21.

when placing the bolt in the side of the metal rememb............ shit wrong book ........................................................................

A blonde and a brunette are walking down a street. What a great way to parade and recognise the various colours that lie upon ones head.

whats in a red suit with a white beard and jolly......st.nick jerking of and blowwing a load in your stocking while taking a shit on you coffee table before theen hanging it back up over the fire place

Ask me if I'm a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

Knock knock Who's there A gorilla A gorilla who? A gorilla is a ground-dwelling, predominantly herbivorous ape that inhabit the forests of central Africa. The eponymous genus Gorilla is divided into two species: the eastern gorillas and the western gorillas, and either four or five subspecies. They are the largest living primates by physical size. The DNA of gorillas is highly similar to that of humans, from 95–99% depending on what is counted, and they are the next closest living relatives to humans after the chimpanzees and bonobos.

What do a Jew and a whale have in common? They're both Jewish. Except the whale.

A girl asks her best friends: Why are you only wearing one earring? The best friends replies: Because I took the other one out.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It is hard to know things like that.

Whats the difference between a baby and a sandwhich... I dont rape my sandwhiches before i eat them

What do you do if you are locked inside a car with a baseball bat? Unlock the car

Daniel is a fag

what did the duck say to the monkey.............. QUACK!!!!!!!!

why do midgets surf in kitchens? because of microwaves.

Chuck Norris tried to return some jeans to Target and when they didn't give him his money he kickeed them in the face.

why was the Jewish person accused of stealing money? because the police found his finger prints.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...