Roses are red, violets are blue.. Oh i can't finish joke coz i gotta go poo ! :/

"Why did Suzie fall off the swing?" "She had no arms." "What did Suzie get for Christmas?" "Cancer." "What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a tub of dead babies?" "I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage." "What did Suzie get for Christmas from me?" "My tub of dead babies."

What is Blue, Pink, and Green, and sometimes sparkles when wet? Grass. I lied about the Blue and Pink to throw you off...because I can.

What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

What did the muffin say to the other muffin? "Hello, nice to meet you."

hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

The Colts this year.

Q:what do u call a dead baby tied to my feet? A:new shoes

Yo mama so dumb she got hit by a bus and didn't know! The funeral was touching and sad. Everyone cried. 2 weeks later..........Johnson ended his own life.......

What did the bank teller say to Santa Claus? May I help you?

Why did the blonde fail her science test? Because she spent all day at the hair salon getting her hair died from brown to blonde when she should have spent the time productively studying.

Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are white And Pansies hold hands and skip

What did the homeless man buy with a dollar? Nothing. He didn't have a dollar.

One dog says to the other "I love going for walks!" A women over-hears, screams "A Talking Dog!", and calls the police. The dog is put down and dissected for scientific research.

If you can cut half a rope. You can cut the whole rope.

What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

What's green and has wheels? grass... i lied about the wheels

A man and a six year old boy are walking along a path through the woods on a moonless night. "Gee mister, I'm scared!" says the boy. "You're scared?" says the man. "I have to walk back alone!"

Whats worse than your roof caving in on you? Being stabbed by yard gnomes.

YOLO

roses are red grass is green your little ugly a*s makes me wanna scream

What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

an american an asian and a jihadist got on a train where did they go no where as the jihadist was strapped to c4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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