A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She compiled and saw the error of her ways.

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Why was six afraid of 7? Because 7 was a terrorist.

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What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Well, a pizza is edible object provided for human consumption, and a jew is a holy human being believing in the prophet abraham.

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A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

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What do you call an Arabic man who crashed a plane into a business building? A careless pilot whose recklessness caused him to crash into a building. His stupidity and lack of plane control skill led to a horrible accident that involved the death of thousands of innocent people and the death of many business people's office pets.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Orange. Orange Who? No, this is Homeland Security. We have raised the current terrorism threat level to Orange, which means there is a high risk of terrorist attacks. Please report any suspicious behavior.

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Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

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Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No.

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What's fat and round and has a ballsack nose? Mr Chicken

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Why was Mary's phone call suddenly disconnected? She was raped.

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An Irishman walked into a bar, except he would call it a pub, because there are slight differences in vocabulary in different regions, 37 minutes later he walked home safely, fed his cat, read some pages of a book he had been reading, turned the light off and went to bed.

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Why couldn't the blonde count to 70? because 69 was a mouth full:)

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what did the lion tell the jellyfish? nothing, both lions and jellyfishes cant talk, and even if they could the chances of a lion meeting a jellyfish are remote

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After eating dinner, my dad said... "That was really good."

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Why does Rebecca Black like Friday? Because it's the start of the weekend

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what is the most confusing day in the ghetto fathers day

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Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

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A black man walks into a bar, and when he left he paid his tab and couldn't have been more courteous.

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what did the guy think who woke up with his hands and feet nailed to a barn. IS THIS BECAUSE IM BLACK!

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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Q: why didn't johnny do his homework? A:because johnny is dead

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A black man has 100 problems. on his AP calculus test.

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What did the physicist say when he got his penis stuck in a test tube? Ah jeesh! I got my penis stuck in a test tube.

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Man: Did it hurt? Woman: huh? Man: Did it hurt when i killed your family?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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