How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

Horse.

Why was the plumber sad? Because his family died in a car crash

Q: Why did Suzie fall out the swings? A: She had no arms. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzie.....

a duck walks up to a lemonade stand, says to the man running the stand. quack, because he's a duck

A priest and a rabbi walk into a gay bar. They are closet homosexuals and are searching for partners to engage in consensual sexual intercourse with.

Men

What's long hard and full of seman. A submarine.

What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

Why did the Chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was in a chicken pen.

Why do people waste time reading these jokes. Because they like anti jokes.

Blonde: Where's the ice? Asian: In the freezer.

whats the best kind of chocolate bar? a larsbar

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't cross it. He was pushed.

What did the senator do after he typed he email? He clicked the send button.

Who gave Miley Cyrus her new haircut? Hellen Keller

Have you heard the one about the blonde and the bear? No. Me neither.

Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

What did the blind kid that couldn't talk get for Christmas Cancer

What does the redhead miss most at a party? Her father. He was in a car accident when she was young.

What did the man say when he lost his car? Where the fuck did my car go

Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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