Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would too if your name was Gnrwhaf

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What happens when there is a jew next to you and you are standing on a train track? A train hits you both and you both die.

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There were two friends, a girl and a boy. The girl had a ribbon tied to her neck, and every day the boy asked her why, yet she'd never tell him. They grew up together, and fell in love and still, she wouldn't tell him why she had the ribbon on her neck. They got married, and grew old, and still she wouldn't tell him. But one day, she said to him 'I'll show you why I keep this on my neck' and she took it off and her head fell off.

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Why was the black man picking cotton from the backyard? Because he enjoys gardening as a hobby, and prefers to do it every Sunday, after work.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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What did the black boy get for Christmas? A bike his parents bought him.

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Can I ask you a question? You just did

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

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Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

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who is gay wit mon james cornish

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Why did grandpa fall asleep naked on a bench? Because his mental condition is slowly deteriorating which is causing him to not be able to properly determine what is and isn't ok to do in public.

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A turtle walks into a bar. The bar tender says "what will it be?" the turtle doesnt reply because its a turtle and the bar tender is sent to a mental hospital for talking to turtles.

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Yo mama is so old, that it's becoming apparent that she is most likely developing severe senial dementia

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Why did the man not get his licence He was blind

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Whats The difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash And one is a watermelon

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my mom died because she was morbidly obese

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Killing your friend as a joke.

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What was the asian person's name? I don't know, I never met him.

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How many babies does it take to paint a barn? It depends on how hard you throw them

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why did Romney loose the election? Because Obama had more votes

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Q. What do you get when you cross a bird with a human? A. Arrested.

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what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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