Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Boy, it's hot in here!" The second muffin replies, "Yes, I'm in a lot of pain. Also, I've had a headache for quite a while now. I went to the doctor last Thursday and he preformed an X-ray but the results are not back yet. This extreme heat is likely worsening my already fragile physical health."

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What do u call fear of Chuck Norris? Logical

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shoe and shoelace. one is meaningless without the other

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Why don't seagulls live in the bay? Because then they'd be bagels

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We know about the cocaine.

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Your mother is so stupid that it would be politically incorrect and socially unacceptable to make asinine, derogatory comments about her challenges.

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What do Ethiopians do at night? Sleep

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Cracked.com the only (depressive) "humor" site.

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Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

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How do you give a 90 year old woman a pap smear? You don't

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? ...Finding the same joke int he Inti-Joke.

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Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

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What did I say when I fell of THEEeEeeeeeeee...

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What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sally.

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What's black and white and red all over? A bleeding penguin.

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WHY did the man refuse to put on his shoes? He didnt want shoes on

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A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

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How do you kill a black guy? Shoot him in the temple

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Roses are red, I have a phone, nobody texts me, forever alone...

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What's worse then having Casey Anthony babysit your child? A girl asking, "Is it in?"

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A black guy gets arrested...

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Why was Jane absent from school today? Because she got mugged on her way there, and soon after was hit by a passing bus.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is legally blind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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