What do you call a prostitute with no arms and legs? Unfortunate, as they've probably have many misfortunes in life.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Today, I had intercourse with a teddy bear

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why is Kim Jong Un so fat? Because he takes all the food in the country and sends his own people to live in concentration camps!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

tim tebow is a great quarterback

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what did the kid say when the bully took his ice cream nothing the bully punched him in the face first.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

knock knock. who's there yourdrive yourdrive who yourdriving me up the wall

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

how do you get a cow in the fridge? Open the fridge, and insert. How do you get a kangaroo in the fridge? Take the cow out and insert What animal is not in the lion king? kangaroo --WHY hes still in the fridge

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your mommas so poor she can't afford food for her child. Thats you.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is the most dangerous gull in the world? A gull with a machine gun!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Your momma is so fat that she is a plus size model and gets paid very well for modeling. Good for her.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What starts with "p" and ends with "orn" Popcorn

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Rub-a-dub-dub three men in a tub, and one was Sandusky.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What is obama's favorite place to eat? Subway

thumb_up thumb_down -3

P0P T4Rt

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A boy dares his friend to jump off the walking bridge. The boy's friend accepts the dare and jumps. What happens next? The boy brain is splattered on the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Once upon a time there was a cat named Martin. He died.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How is a Jew and a White Person alike. 'cuz you touch yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why did the mexican cross the road to get to the other country

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why was John the octopus depressed? Because his real name was Steve, and he couldn't communicate this to anyone since he lacked the higher brain functions and vocal chords required to do so.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do you make a salesperson cry? Shoot him in the face and throw him off a cliff

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A black man without problems.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops