What would you call a guy with no arms or legs in the water ? Well you would probably call for help, because he would be drowning seeing as how he has no limbs.

thumb_up thumb_down

What happened to the man who was raking leaves? He kept his yard clean and felt great about his hard work.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did billy go to the beach? To spread his moms ashes on the sand.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock, knock. Who's there? Chris Hanson with To Catch A Predator.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Are you from Tennessee? Cause Jamaican me crazy.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q:Where does a woman work at if she has 1 leg? A: IHOP!!! :)

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A man is walking down thwe street. All of the sudden, an armoured truck comes around the corner really fast. The back doors swing open, and bags of money fly toward him. "I can believe this is real!" the Man exclaimed. "It's not. Feed the pig." said a man in pig suit with a giant coin-slot on the head.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

1 + 1 = ? 2 "No" "what have you been smoking?" "Seriously, 1+1= window" "WTF???"

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What is worse than a worm in you're apple? Two worms in you're apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Three guys and 4 Catholics are in a bar. They guys are making a joke. The first one says I'm gonna go to Oregon there's no Catholics there and the second one says I'm gonna go to Ohio there is no Catholics there and the third one says I'm gonna go to Alaska there's no Catholics there and one of the Catholics walk up and say how about you go to hell theres no Catholics there.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? I did too, he worked hard for four years, partied in moderation, but graduated with a degree in chemical engineering and became very successful in the business world in order to support his wife and two children.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

what color is blue? green

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was tomato...

thumb_up thumb_down -50

What's long brown and sticky? S**t

thumb_up thumb_down -50

What did the Hindenburg say? -nothing it just blew up

thumb_up thumb_down -64

Q. What red and scratches glass A. a baby in an oven

thumb_up thumb_down -82

Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell into the mud.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding cancer on your back

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

your mom

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What do you do when you fall asleep? You sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

How do you know that your at a gay barbecue? Because, the hot dogs taste like shit!

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops