You're mama's so stupid, she decided to go back to school and finish her degree in Russian Literature to improve her self-esteem and maybe -- just maybe -- save her marriage, which had been on the rocks, mostly due to her intolerable self-loathing.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "I just found out my wife has cervical cancer."

A group of blondes rent a car and decide to drive to Disney World. Along the highway, they see a sign reading "Disney World left." They exit the highway, turn left, and enjoy their well-deserved vacation from practicing law.

Today is jessica's birthday and she is turnig 6 She walks in the living room to tell her dad its her birthday. Jessica"Dad, Dad guess how old i am today!" Dad "How old?" Jessica"6 dad im am 6". she walks into the kitchen to tell her Grandad Jessica" papa papa guess how old i am today" Grandad"Well for me to know this you would have to take of your panties" as he tells her she did as she was told. her grandad fingers her and smells her panties. He tells her "You are 6 today" Jessica"How did you know" Grandad"I listen as you told your dad in the dinning room".

How many Jews can you fit in a car? 10. 3 in back, 2 up front and the rest in the ash tray.

Did you hear the one about the guy who went his whole life without ever telling a joke? He was still funnier than David Letterman.

2 men walk into a bar, the 3rd man ducks and ask them if they're ok

Q. Why did the boy fall off the swing? A. He had no arms or legs. Q. What did he get for Christmas? A. A drumset Q. Knock Knock Who's there Not him

Why Tom is Gay ? Because brocoly didnt eat a mashroom .

Q: How do you make an onion cry? A: You can't, it's an onion.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

what did Stan say to Dave? nothing, Dave died 500 years before Stan was born, thus he said nothing.

How far can a baby fly? As far as you can throw it.

What do you say to an over weight Jewish mother? "Work on those crunches" He was her coach.

knock knock whos there micheal jackson too soon

Why didn't Jacob marry Bella from Twilight? You have to be real to marry someone

KNOCK KNOCK who's there? OUCH! what's your door knob made of? nails?

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

What do you call a person who is deaf. It doesn't matter, they wont be able to hear it when you call them.

my whole life!

justin bieber is a good singer april fools haha you thought hell had frozen over

Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Reading re-posts of classic anti jokes posted by lonely teenagers.

Knock Knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? Both your parents are dead John.

Roses are red. Violets are grey. People hate me. Mongoose.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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