Why did Suzie fall off the Swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

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Why do Asians get 50% off on movies? They don't.

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Your mothers so ugly that when memory sees her it says " Damn-it I hate my job!

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Who's blind but can see, deaf but can hear, and dumb yet can solve the most complex mathematical equations? Helen Keller-Norris

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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roses ar red violets ar blue i have aids

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Want to hear the funniest joke in the world? I forget how it goes but it ends with the abolishment of slavery.

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How is a monkey like a bicycle? They can both climb trees. Except for the bicycle.

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Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

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A woman walks into a bar. Guys aren't the only ones walking into bars.

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Why was billy bad at telling jokes? Billy was sexually abused as a child and humour was never really part of his life

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Who would win, Chuck Norris or a T-Rex? The T-Rex, Chuck Norris would get ripped apart like any other human-being.

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What did the depressed man get for his birthday? a rope

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Why did the chicken successfully cross the road? It didn't in the middle of the street it got hit by a car.

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Your mamas so stupid, her IQ is lower than the average person of her age group.

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Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

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Whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Jay-z

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a group of teenagers are laughing at a boy around their age when on says "youre stupid" the boy then replies "i prefer the term Autistic"

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So a cat a dog are in a field.The dog then proceeds to eat the cat and take a nap

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Q: What is harder than cleaning off baby bloodstains off a wall? A: Cleaning multiple baby blood stains off a wall.

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A: Why are black people so good at sports? B: Practice and determination.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops