Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

Next up, Sharpi and Ryan take their audition faliure very seriously in "columbine high school musical"

What do you call two black men riding on a tandem bicycle? Best friends.

What's worse, a dead baby or an abortion? A dead baby on a bayonet

What's funnier than 100 dead babies? Everything.

why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

What does a black person call black friday? Friday

Roses are red Violets are red Bushes are red Why's my garden on fire?

What's blue and can't read? The Pacific Ocean

What is big has a red nose and is funny Don't ask me I have never been out of my house

Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

Wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is the girl next door.

What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

whats black, white, and bloody all over? i don't know, but we should stop making jokes and help it already.

A rapist, black guy, and a homophob walk into a bar and the bartender says nice game last night kobe.

What does a blonde's pussy taste like? The same as her brain, cabbage.

Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A. One's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other's a highly trained professional skilled in the art of litigation.

Barack Obama, Joe Biden, and the Devil all walk into a bar. Biden and Obama order a couple of beers and begin quietly conversing, while their security detail stands next to them. "The Devil" is actually a heavily tattooed performance artist, who in 1999 legally changed his name from Jim Larson. He has just gotten off work at his day job (a paralegal at a medium-sized firm), and is relaxing with a Johnnie Walker at the bar. Although he notices the president and vice president nearby, he has seen many politicians during his time working in DC, and so hardly pays attention.

who do you call when you see a ghost in your apartment? The Mental Hospital.

haiku's are funny. but sometimes they don't make sense. refrigerator.

Have u seen Ray Charles' piano "no" neither did he

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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