You can teach a man to fish but you cant teach a fish to man

A plane crashed in the rainforest. The survivors all buried themselves because no survival equipment was left and they all sought to kill themselves in their deep state of shock and fear.

what did the window say to the other window nothing they are both inanimate objects

A man walks into a bar and says "ow"; he stepped on a nail sticking up through one of the floorboards. He then sues the bartender for a large sum of money because of the injury he sustained, and causes the bartender to lose everything he owns in order to pay off his debt.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

I agree

Knock Knock! Who's there? My arm! My arm who? My arm is everywhere!

Knock knock no answer, as the tenant of the house was out shopping.

That was me, I thought we where friends now... I am so sorry, I really did not send anyone nor anything, I would never do such a thing! What happened to you is terrible, I did say I knew who they where and that they are in prison, but that was a lie, I just wanted for you to think I was really confident and in control. Please Nero, let me speak to you, nothing is like you think, Jenny is my stepmother, please don't do anything.

A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

What did the radiator say to the carpet? Nothing, a radiator is an inanimate object, and therefore is unable to speak.

If you give a man a fish, he'll eat it.

What do you call a black guy eating fried chicken -A black guy being black

Knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Me me Oh

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

Why do you do when a homeless man asks you for money Scream bicycle and then run

What do you do when you have a baby and your being shot by a terrorist. You use the baby as a shield.

Knock knock. Whos there? Death. You will die in the next 12 hours from terminal cancer.

why was the boy crying? cause an elephant tusked him up the ass

whats worse than finding 10 dead baby's in 1 garbage can... finding 1 dead baby's in 10 garbage can

The Qur'an

I had an amnesia joke But it was written down on a slip of paper because someone else wrote it down. Let me just take it out & read it to you

A blind man walks into a bar... He tragicly attracts aids and dies as the bar is shut down for health purposes

What's worse than finding an apple in your worm... I mean, a worm in your apple ? "Then I took an arrow to the knee" jokes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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