What did the 11 year old boy get for christmas? A wet dream

Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape his burning car wreck.

How do you drown a blonde? Same as anyone else. Tie three-hundred cinder blocks to her and drop her into a lake.

What do a turtle and a bowling ball have in common? Nothing

My dog barks when someones at the door.

What is green and fuzzy and when it falls from a tree, your dead? A pool table.

My spelling is horrible

On a scale of 1 to 10, 6 being the highest how confused are you?

Why did the aisian man get pulled over? Because he was going over the speed limit .

Why did the feminist complain? that's what they do

Q: What did the crippled deaf kid get for Christmas? A: A motorised wheelchair and a cochlear implant. Good for him.

Twinkle twinke little star How I wonder what you are? Star: (Noun) A fixed luminous point in the night sky that is a large, remote incandescent body like the sun.

When Chuck Norris claps, his two hands slam together, creating rather loud soud.

This is my fist. Would you politely run into it as fast as you can?

Why did the short man fall down the stairs? He got shot in the face with an assault rifle.

What's good about eating every night? Knowing that an African won't.

what do you call a prostitute with white eyes? emma , with the cloudy iris,

What happened to the hungry child? He got out of Africa

Q: What would happen if you didn't sleep all night? A: You would probably be really tired and start seeing things and speaking strange sentences as a result.

old spice body spay is so powerfull it can block BO for 16 hours. its so powerfull it can turn of the sun, but then it gets to cold, so it makes another sun........DOUBLE SUN POWWWWWEEEERRRRRRR!!!

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers

The WNBA

yo mama so fat she died from a heart attack

once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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